I think creating special moments in the hectic anarchy that day to day life can become is vital to a good relationship. By slowing things down a bit and enjoying each other’s company you can at least for a moment wipe away all the worries and needless confusion. The best part is you don’t need to do a lot of planning, and there’s no need to reinvent the wheel. One of the ways that I try to slow things down a bit is by occasionally giving my wife pancakes in bed. And I’m always rewarded when I hear her bragging about it to her sister. I only have to get up 15 minutes earlier than her, and I pretty much exclusively do it on the weekend so we don’t have to be anywhere any time soon. But I don’t do it every weekend.
The truth is that my wife would like me to do breakfast in bed for her more often. But I like to mix things up a bit so she never knows what I might do next to show her I care. By mixing things up I accomplish two distinct but very important goals. Firstly I make sure breakfast in bed never becomes what is expected. And secondly I keep her guessing. When something becomes expected it runs the risk of losing its specialness. And if I let my wife come to expect breakfast in bed at a certain time or in regular intervals then I run the risk of making it a chore. Loving your wife should never be a chore. But the second goal is arguably more important. You see a woman’s brain works differently than ours. A woman’s brain works by making connections, Billions of them. Some might say this is the root of the saying “woman’s intuition.” But I won’t go there. The point is that by keeping her guessing you are in fact letting her constantly make new connections on top of old connections. I’m not qualified to take this much farther but if you have any thoughts on the matter I’d enjoy your input.In order to keep her guessing it is important to have an arsenal of ideas to fall back on at a moment’s notice. You can’t always rely on the weekend to create special moments and it’s in fact important to fit them in throughout the week. Some of the things I like to do are bring her a glass of wine when she’s in the bath, give her a foot massage while watching TV or stick a little love note in her lunch bag. I may have even folded the laundry once. It is important to point out that these things are not manipulative or being a so called player. The goal here is to love your wife actively. If that’s not your goal them maybe you should grow up. Here are some more ideas surely to make a few special moments:
- Run her hair through your fingers before falling asleep
- Fill her car up with gas
- Clean under the toilet seat
- Go on a short picnic
- Turn off the TV
- Send flowers to her at work
- Tell her she’s beautiful
- Let her have a nap
- Cuddle her
- Look at her a little too long
- Feed her with your fork
- Watch your wedding video with her
I hope you notice from this short list that you need not be together when your specially created moment comes to fruit. All that matters is she’s thinking of you when it happens and that you do it for sincere reasons. If there is one thing that will destroy everything it is insincerity. So pick one of these ideas or make up your own and let her know you love her today. Your rewards will be multiplied. But don’t do it for any reward. Do it because you love her.
Feel free to comment on this post as you wish. I am really interested in hearing any ideas you have for creating special moments with your wife. As always I am also open to any criticisms you may have as well. I will use your criticisms to make this blog better and more informative.
